Into the Wild or Wild

“May be i wanted to sleep with all those men..May be Heroine taught me something.” – Cheryl Strayed.

Some films are not just films to be watched and pass them by as weekend releases. They are messages, some signs and some points to ponder. “Wild” is one of them.

We watched this movie last night, only to come out thinking too much.

So much so, that it became a craving to blog about it. There is really no point in talking about the performance and direction and any film related stuff.

It’s what she goes through in her journey and the lines that she mutters in her head that stays with you.

Her line “I am more lonely in my real life then here” kinda resonates with a lot of us in some ways. How busy are we trying to establish our social connections and being in touch with the world. Internet just about all the time. And we freak out the moment 3G goes down.

But Cheryl Strayed actually spent over three months being alone and waiting for any kind of interaction with life at the next corner. Even if it was with a fox or a horse...I have been thinking how she would have cherished every single relation of hers after this hike.

So does that mean that we need to pack our bags and leave the lives we are leading in order to redeem ourselves?? I am guessing not. Because we don’t live in Minneapolis. But what I take back from this movie is only that there is a way to redeem oneself only if we have the realisation. Everybody comes with their own shit and do their own shit...so everybody needs to figure out their own PCT.

Strangely, while I watching this film, there was another film running in circles through my mind.

‘Into the Wild’. Christopher McCandless...was no Cheryl Strayed. He was a good boy.  He gives up his decent life by choice. But he had a sad end. His heart wrenching SOS message was unbearable.

“	Attention Possible Visitors. S.O.S. I need your help. I am injured, near death, and too weak to hike out. I am all alone, this is no joke. In the name of God, please remain to save me. I am out collecting berries close by and shall return this evening. Thank you, Chris McCandless. August?

Strangely, I have been drawing inspiration from McCandless for a very long time. And in walked, Cheryl Strayed.

 

Who is more of a hero? The one who makes it and redeems herself or the one who doesn’t and seeks redemption in death.

Question that plagues me. Well, just one more thing...Into the Wild had that owner of haunting voice 

Eddie Vedder and his unbelievable music. Society... Society, you're a crazy breed
I hope you're not lonely without me

Red is a Firestarter

What do you do when you are in that Firestarter kind of mood!! Desperate to

channelize the inner poet!!



 Start by a known feeling. Sexiness is a feeling to conquer your own self. And in the

process if sets the world on fire, good for the world. Deep red for me is a fire starter.

Waking up early in the morning and sipping my cuppa is also a fire starter. I am

saying yes to the signals. I know it’s gonna be a good good day...

There is one more thing which is sexiness. The feel of the softest fabric against my

body. It forms like a comfortable cocoon. Feeling that leaves me wanting more. Like

my “ruffled chiffon boat neck balloon top” whoaaa what a long description. It’s so

old that I seriously don’t remember where I bought it from. But, it’s there in my

wardrobe. They say you’ll never know what where you find what you are looking for.

It may just be all around you.

In the tinkling of your bangles or even the smell of coffee close to your lips. The deal

is to be aware that our entire body is made of steel. All we need to do is feel things

and love.

There is another thing that is a firestarter. The energy from the sun. I sound like a

lazy bum with not much to do. But isn’t that fun. Walk around, sip coffee, dream,

gaze at the sky, listen to music of the bangles...well, sometimes it does feel nice to

be girly girl...



But there is one song that i have been humming today. You remember the Rolling

Stones?? The Loving Cup!! Give me a little drink from your loving cup.

Just one drink and i'll fall down drunk.

When Valentine’s over..love now seems to be in the air. Or is it just Red!!

In the Middle of a work week

When you are not a slave to the day of the week at work, you know you are free. When you know that your day doesn’t begin at 9am but a couple of hours earlier, you know it’s gonna be fun. It’s interesting when I have to watch beautiful women look even more beautiful as part of my work.

I see that shimmer in their eyes when they make for a gorgeous picture. And also make some money from it.

Well, the interesting part is also me. On most occasion, I am an antithesis of a fashion shoot. If the whole brigade is in blingy stilettos, I am twirling in my worn out keds. If they have everything pink and proper, I am in my oddly sized knot shirt and favourite denims.

I am not sure why I do that. But I find an immense satisfaction in just fading into the scene where I find my own story, my own magic and my own moment.

I am not saying that I don’t like ‘pretty’ but i prefer the background, what’s behind the scene.

As a kid I learnt an amazing thing – “i am not a leader nor am I follower but I am so much fun just sitting on the fence”.

My world today was my perfect place. I had my small memories tucked around me snugly. I picked up one of favourite accessories which i got hand made from a tribal woman in Gangtok. Its special because it bought on one of my first solo trips as a very young girl.

The colours of stones strung around a piece of thread have stayed with me years. They still hold good.

Yes, my shirt says ’hippie’. And somehow I like the feeling of that word. There was a time when i used to call myself ‘Ambition free Hippie’. I just liked the sound of it.

What I am trying to arrive at is a space which somewhere exists in the middle of our everyday life. The idea is not be preachy. But in everything I did today, or wore today or even heard today had no obvious dorky rebellion. But it had everything to be an accepted spectator without sticking out.

Since no part of my life is without music, I kept humming a line from Def Leppard’s mush filled song “Two steps behind” – “There’s a magic running through your soul”...I wish the old world rock makes a come back...or maybe I like being stuck in time. 

Neruda writes the saddest lines

When you encounter something like Pablo Neruda’s poetry, you begin to think, can I someone really write like that?

I mean, you need to be able to feel like that and love like that or even hurt like that.

Well, I am really glad that I encountered his writing in my lifetime.

It makes me believe there is madness in the universe which keeps its going. With no mood to get out and look sexy, i wanted to feel sexy.

And I stumbled upon Pablo Neruda’s “Isla Negra”. Poets like him make me nervous. It’s like an affair that I want it because you crave it but I am scared because it will F*** my brains. It will make me think and cry. It forces me to think of my first real love, the kiss that still sends shiver down my body...am I up for that kinda day??

With that nervousness, i grab the book vulnerably. These pages have slipped through my fingers for years. Ever since I knew what poetry meant to a dork like me.

Neruda takes me to the pulsating tease of Chile..South America, where lovers are not sacred of their love. His poetry wants me to be forever in love.

One of my most favourite lines written by Neruda is from his epic poem – “The Sea”. He says, “I need the sea because it teaches me. I don’t know if I learn music or awareness, if it’s a single wave or its vast experience, or only its harsh voice or its shining one, a suggestion of fishes and ships.

The fact is that until i fall asleep, in some magnetic way I move in the University of the waves.”

Oh!! Damn you Neruda. Did I tell you that I spent my last few days in Goa by the beach. The waves were so close to me, that I could smell the salt in my breath as I would fall asleep listening to them.

I kept remembering his lines imaging if he ever would've felt the way I did. 

This is turning out to be such a weird post. There are no clothes, no brands, no accessories...there is poetry of Pablo Neruda, his magic to churn your gut out even in your grave. And there are memories of that magical piece of land called Goa.

Well I guess, it pays to be me. We are not confined to one dimension. We are free. In the wardrobe or out of it...its all in our minds. 

Get your freak on!

#MissyElliot has no idea how much these words mean to me as I dig into my ward robe. The trouble is, it’s Monday morning and I plan to freak the shit out of the world.

What do most people feel on a Monday morning? Blue!! Right!

But I plan to break all rules. The best place to start is my #dorky wardrobe. My hands move through the hangers of mess and I pull out a classic #LBD..oooooHH.

Then Missy’s words hit me – “Gimme some new shit yeah”. So while the LBD stays, I carelessly adorn it with a flowery chiffon crop top from Promod. Rule break number one. You bitch. You killed the great “LBD”.

Once again Missy’s words “I know you dig the way I sw-sw-switch my style” scream into my ears. She’s talkin to me yea..

What do pretty barbies accessories their great LBDs with? Pearls?? Diamonds??

Oh Hon!! We are dorks!! We are grunge!! We are everything that is unusual. So I decided to choose accessories which are not conventionally paired with LBDs.

I love my eternity bangles in brass. Do they go with my outfit?? Well, I don’t care. The thing with these gorgeous eternity bangles is that they have a story of their own. It’s about eternal love. Love that has no beginning and no end. The kind of story that I resonate with.

In middle of a meeting on some technology solutions for digital screens, I was fiddling around with my bold and big Medallion neckpiece.

What’s the story behind that? At the same time, I found myself grappling with the term “success ladder”. It was too much to analyse. But gods are on my side this Monday. I found one abandoned ladder in my backyard.

These are all armours which are meant to kill the classic and oh so right #LBD.

In the end I got so tired of breaking rules that I needed a dose of sanity. Black wedges Bershka (BSK). Dorks, these are comfy and compatible. Please have them in your wardrobe.

I dunno which one it is today – “Some days, I can conquer the world; Other days, it takes me three hours to convince myself to bathe.” – the unknown.

Here's the song if you thought of listening to it too!

Blue Friday

And its Fridddayyyy...Yeah! and the worst is, its #Friday before the vicious and unimaginative #Valentine'sday..red is in the air..ohhh and so the girls are in red and pink and all things nice.

Thank god I woke before nightmare became a reality.

Time check – Bob Marley in the house. I dig into my dorky wardrobe. It’s as messed up as my head.

Facing the biggest dilemma of the century. What should i wear which that’ll hide my tattoos and not have my bra strap sticking out. After all, i have an external image of high flying executive in a high profile company.

So may be it’s a respectable pair of Superdry jeans with a full sleeves white shirt and a strappy heeled sandals. Wow. i have everything covered. May be i’ll slip in a coloured bra.

Nahhhhh. Not dorky enough. My mood is blue and not red. Oh and where is the #bling?? It is still in these days.

So i decide to paint the world blue only to kill red. I am the devil in the cupid. What is bluer than the coolest denims. And that’s not all, there is a sexy denim shrug that sits on top of the mess. I am amazed at its compatibility to go with f*ckiing everything. Clearly it is nothing like me but I still love it the most.

Hmmm. But that’s not enough of blue. I am suddenly reminded of my status of high flying and oh..’seniorly’ enough respect worthy executive. So safe stripes??

No. Unsafe #stripes. Thankfully, a truly loved brand Mango had the quirk to have re-invent a perfectly safe blue and white stripes into a sexy strappy blouse with a leathery tie-neck. Well the strap is barely there. But it’s there.

Fortunately, I am safe with bags these days. Sort of brings in sanity. So I am slinging with a Promod bag which is more like a sack but cool nonetheless.

Voila, I created balance of universe in all blues...denims on denims with almost safe blue stripes.

Wait. The bling is missing. A little blingy belt with some #garagejewellery straight from house of madness somewhere in Prague’s Jewish area. 

I am ready. No wait up a little bit more. Shoes?? Footwear?? Chappals?? Gladiators?? Oh no. A big Friday dilemma. Another much loved brand Promod does crazy shoes. I mean, you buy them only if you know them. And i know them. So black sporty shoes with more #bling.

 Thank god that the red in my hair has turned gold. I would have not felt so blue. There is one last stroke to feel good and also look good – classic #aviators from D&G.

Dolce & Gabbana Sunglasses